Ageless Style, Unshakable Confidence, and Living Life on Your Own Terms
Turning 40 was supposed to terrify him — but for Stanley Dru, it became the year he finally found freedom, confidence, and his truest self. From BDD struggles to redefining men’s style, Stanley shares how age, authenticity, and unapologetic fashion can empower any man to live life on his own terms.
GWF: Tell us a little bit about yourself
I’m Stan. I’m a content creator and the founder of an underwear brand. I’m Welsh, but I live in Leeds, West Yorkshire with my boyfriend Tom.
GWF: You’ve just turned 40 — how does this new chapter feel, personally and professionally?
I’m actually turning 41 in four months, which I can’t quite believe. I had a pact with myself, and it sounds really sad now, but I said that I wouldn’t live past 40. Age used to terrify me. The idea of my body ageing, my skin changing, my hair thinning… I clung to youth like it was everything, like without it I was nothing. Having BDD only amplified that. Ageing felt like fuel on a fire I was already trying to control.
But my forties have been lush. Truly. Since speaking openly about my age, something I kept quiet online because I feared brands would lose interest or followers would disappear, but the opposite has happened. I’ve grown. Professionally, it’s been my best year yet. Personally, I feel more grounded.
I’ve also learned that ageing is an absolute privilege. With everything happening in the world, reaching milestones like this feels less frightening and more meaningful.
GWF: Many people are surprised when they learn your age. What does turning 40 mean to you in terms of confidence and self-image?
I do love how surprised people are when they find out my age. I think we all carry preconceived ideas about what 40 “should” look like, and for some reason people don’t think I fit that mould. I don’t know if it’s how I dress, how I present myself, or just who I am, but it’s given me the confidence to speak more freely about age. I want to show that you can wear what you like and do what you want at any stage of life.
The world has a very rigid understanding of age. I constantly hear, “I can’t wear that, I’m ___ years old,” or “I should be married by now, I’m ___ years old.” I want to stomp on those rules. Honestly? Eff it.
Buy the house. Or rent forever. Get married. Or don’t. There are zero rules. Age shouldn’t limit who you are. I’ll dress how I want and live how I want, until I decide otherwise, not when society tells me to.
And I think I’m only now learning to appreciate myself more, since turning 40, since getting help for my BDD, since being medicated and speaking candidly about my intrusive OCD thoughts. Maybe it’s fair to say I feel the most “me” I ever have. And that feels powerful.
GWF: Has your style evolved as you’ve gotten older? If so, how?
When I was younger, my mum dressed my brother and me exactly alike. He’s a year younger, with olive skin, dark brown hair, chocolate eyes. I was blonde, pale, hazel-eyed. Chalk and cheese. But we had the same haircuts, the same outfits. We looked cute, but I remember feeling so excited about the day I’d choose my own clothes. I still feel that excitement now.
I’ve had every hair colour imaginable. Chin piercings, ear piercings, mohawks. I’ve reinvented myself hundreds of times. I’m not sure I ever fully knew what my style was. I’ve experimented a lot, mesh tops, statement pieces, even designing beautiful pieces for ASOS for my menswear line a few years ago. But only recently do I feel like I’m really understanding what makes me feel confident.
I don’t have endless money, so designer pieces are mostly out of reach, but I’m investing in better-quality staples that suit my silhouette. My outfits in Paris over Christmas with Tom were some of my favourites EVER.
I’m definitely still evolving. And I hope I always am.
GWF: How would you describe your personal style in a few words — and what influences it most?
That’s a hard one. I’d say: modern European gentleman with a fashion editor’s eye. Minimalist with a Parisian café nonchalance and a subtle rock-romantic undertones…does that even make sense!
I’m heavily influenced by film, I’m a movie geek, and I always keep an eye on catwalks and trends. But I’m definitely a mood dresser.
If I feel powerful, I dress powerful. If I feel confident, I’ll wear a crop tee. If I’m stressed, it’s all about comfort. My fashion is deeply connected to how I feel.
GWF:What are three wardrobe essentials every man should own, no matter his age?
First: a proper pair of underwear. Underwear is wildly underappreciated. If it’s too small, it distorts your shape and your comfort. I love knowing I feel put together both dressed and undressed, it changes your posture and your confidence.. I recommend “THE FATES” underwear (I’m bias)
Second: a beautiful pair of loafers. Something timeless and comfortable that elevates any outfit. My YSL penny loafers, which I found on Vinted…INSTANTLY take a look up a notch.
Third: a pair of jeans that fit your body perfectly. One pair that hugs all the right areas and can be dressed up or down. I’m a big believer in a capsule wardrobe, but then I take a millions items on holiday with me, I like the IDEA of a capsule wardrobe in theory..
GWF: What’s one common style mistake you see men make?
Skinny jeans. It’s no longer a mistake — it’s an abomination. Slim leg trousers still have a place, but skin-tight? Absolutely not, sorry.
GWF: What inspired you to start creating men’s style content on social media?
My platforms initially focused on architecture and documenting life from my perspective. It was never about me. But people started asking about my outfits and how I styled things. So I began sharing more fashion content. At first, it was just a hobby. Then brands began reaching out, first gifting, then paid collaborations…which felt surreal.
I realised people were genuinely interested in what I was wearing (and occasionally what I wasn’t wearing, haha). And somehow, that’s been my life for the past four years.
GWF:How do you stay authentic in a world of filters, trends, and fast fashion?
You have to stay true to who you are, but also be willing to learn and admit mistakes. In the beginning, I said yes to almost every brand because I couldn’t believe anyone trusted me to create content. But posting seven ads a week for similar products isn’t authentic.
Now, my platforms show my relationship, my humour, my gym obsession, my mental health journey, my pride in my community, and even my political views, which I never thought I’d speak about publicly (and a few ads thrown in here and there with brands I respect and genuinely use)
I have a platform, and I feel a responsibility to use it. I won’t always get it right. But I try to speak with respect and grace, and if I overstep, I apologise. I’m a prolific people pleaser. No one feels worse about upsetting someone than I do.
I won’t lie, posting my body still gives me mini heart attacks. Even with kind followers, I worry. BDD makes my confidence fragile. Social media can be destructive for my mental health. But I also have the most incredible community. They build me up constantly. They’ve become part of my healing process and I bloody love them all.
GWF: Do you feel pressure to “look young” online — and how do you navigate that?
I’ve always felt pressure to look young, but I think that pressure started long before social media. BDD means there’s always a voice dissecting my appearance, my hair, my skin, my body. I’ve learned to coexist with that voice. I’ve probably masked it for over 30 years.
Looking “young” was never really the goal. Looking fresh, awake, put together, that felt controllable. And with BDD, control is everything. But what I’ve realised is this: I don’t want to look young. I want to look and feel my best.
I don’t believe age should dictate what you can wear or how you can live. Some people seem ageless, not because they look 25 forever, but because they exist fully and confidently in their space.
That’s what I want. To exist beyond a number, to wear what I want, to live without shrinking and to remove the stigma around age entirely. That would feel like true freedom xxx
